Growing Together
by MollyPiper
Summary: Tony has avoided dealing with the growing distance between himself and the rest of the team for years now but when he finds himself left alone to cope with a gut wrenching situation he must finally confront his issues in order to lean on them for the support he desperately needs.
1. Chapter 1

Tony paced the corridors of the children's hospital, anxiously awaiting some news. He had started the day out at Bethesda but while the Navy hospital could handle delivering babies and taking care of newborns it simply wasn't equipped to handle preemies so the small DiNozzo family had been transferred to the NICU at the only hospital in the DC area dedicated solely to children. Dimly it occurred to Tony that he should have been at work right now but it was only a fleeting thought. His tiny children, born way too early, were Tony's only priority at the moment.

Besides, he hadn't even told anyone at NCIS he was going to be a father yet. His team were the closest thing he had to family but Tony really felt as though he had grown apart from them during the past couple of years. He also knew that some of the team members didn't have a very high opinion of him. His goofy, frat boy persona may be good for getting suspects to let their guard down around him but it wasn't so good for letting his colleagues know that he was a smart, capable agent and a good man. If they knew about this Tony could just imagine their snarky comments. They would say that considering his serial dating habit it had only been a matter of time until something like this happened and that they were surprised it hadn't happened sooner. Tony teased his colleagues quite often so if he dished it out he should be able to take it but he was still keeping his mouth firmly closed. It had taken Tony a while to warm up to the idea of being a father but on the day he'd seen the babies on the ultrasound monitor, moving inside their mother's body, and been told that he was having two sons he had gone home and cried. It hit him that for the first time since his mother died when he was eight years old he was going to have a proper family again. He wasn't going to be alone in the world anymore. Tony knew he deserved his colleagues' taunts but his boys didn't. He loved his sons with his entire being and he would protect them from anyone, even the people who were supposed to care the most.

Tony had never imagined being in a situation like this, though. He had known right from the beginning that he was going to be a single parent. The mother, Kat, was a waitress, about seven or eight years younger than him. They'd 'dated' for want of a better word for a few weeks until they both agreed that, while it had been fun, it was time to move on. After that Tony hadn't heard from Kat again until she randomly showed up at his door one night, about a month later. She was pregnant, she said, and he was the father. She could barely support herself so she definitely couldn't afford to take care of two kids. She didn't believe in abortion, though so she would go through with the pregnancy and give the babies up after they were born.

Tony had offered to pay a generous amount of child support but Kat was adamant. She had to work hard just to survive herself. Even if she had the money to take care of them she didn't have time to raise twins. Kat told Tony that the ball was in his court now. He could raise the babies himself, as a single dad, or he could allow them to go up for adoption. Tony had agonised over the decision. Kids had never been high on his list of priorities because he feared turning out like his father but if he gave up the twins because raising them seemed too hard wouldn't that be acting just like senior? His father may have disowned him but, as the only grandchild, Tony had inherited a generous trust fund when Grandfather Paddington died. He didn't use it much, other than to buy suits and DVDs so the balance was still high. That meant taking care of twins wouldn't be hard financially, even if he had to give up work for a while, but Tony still hadn't been sure that keeping them was the right thing to do. He imagined a happily married couple, probably older than him and infertile, who were desperate for children. Tony knew that there were probably people out there who would love his sons as their own and give the boys everything, including the stability that his job didn't allow for, but he felt sick at the thought. In the end he had made the only decision that seemed logical. It wouldn't be easy but he was going to keep the babies. These were his sons and he would not turn his back on them.

Now he couldn't even be sure if the babies would live long enough for him to take them home. Kat had called him at 1am to say that she was in labour and, even though it was way too early, the doctors didn't think that they could stop it. He'd rushed to Bethesda, arriving just in time to see his sons, born at just 27 weeks, come into the world. They were so small Tony could have held one of them in the palm of his hand. Kat had distanced herself right away, saying that she wanted nothing to do with the babies. She'd made it clear to Tony all along that that was what she was going to do but he'd still thought that she would stay, at least for a while, because the boys had been so premature. She hadn't though and Tony couldn't help but hate her a little bit for it. He didn't know Kat that well – they'd had lunch together once a week and gone to her OBGYN appointments together – but even her company would have been good right now. Tony felt sick as he paced the corridors alone, desperately awaiting some news.

Was this his fault? he wondered. Had his delay in deciding whether or not to keep the babies somehow caused this? Was he being punished because, until that ultrasound where he'd actually been able to see the babies for the first time, he hadn't particularly wanted them? For a long time he had feared the changes to his lifestyle being a single parent would bring and he wasn't sure he wanted to make those changes. Were his two helpless infants lying in the NICU because of his selfishness? Tony hadn't set foot in church since he was a child but he found himself praying to god that so long as the boys survived this he would spend the rest of his life working to make it up to them. Tony had lost so many people he cared about. His mother had died. Kate had died. Paula had died. Jenny had died. He couldn't loose the boys as well. Tony had been weathering the storm for years now but he knew that if he lost his sons there would be no coming back for him this time. If the boys died then he would as well.

Finally at about eight o'clock in the morning Tony's agonising vigil ended. The door to the family room he was now waiting in opened and one of the consultants stepped in. Tony could tell, just by her body language, that the news wasn't as bad has he'd feared it would be but he couldn't tell whether the news was good or not. "Agent DiNozzo?" she said. "I'm Doctor Bainbridge. I have some news."


	2. Chapter 2

"Where the hell is Tony?" McGee grumbled, infuriated by the Senior Field Agent's no-show.

"I don't know," Ziva said, glancing warily at Gibbs who, by now, was boiling with rage. "But if he doesn't get here soon Gibbs is going to slap the ceiling."

"I think you mean hit the roof," McGee said. "But yes, you're right. Gibbs is going to go mental and you and I will be the ones in the firing line. God, why does Tony always do this? If he's going to act like a child the least he could do is take the consequences."

On the other side of the bullpen Gibbs violently slammed his desk drawer shut. "McGEE!" he roared.

"Yes boss?" McGee stammered, hoping that Gibbs hadn't overheard his comment.

"Have you tried contacting DiNozzo?"

"Yes, boss. I've tried calling both his cell phone and his landline. He answered neither."

McGee winced even as he said the words. Never be unreachable was one of Gibbs' most important rules and Tony had broken it. He was really going to be in for it when Gibbs inevitably got hold of him.

'Too damn bad,' he thought, squashing what little sympathy he had managed to muster for the absent agent. Tony brought this on himself.

McGee had always liked Tony well enough but he hated the way the man acted like a child and always got away with it. It annoyed McGee how Tony acted like an oversexed frat boy, bragging about his many conquests, using juvenile nicknames and playing childish pranks. McGee had never been able to understand why Tony was Senior Field Agent. He thought that Gibbs should give the job to someone smarter and more capable. Someone like..…him. Perhaps this would be the final nail in the older man's professional coffin, he thought wistfully.

"Well go to his apartment and get him!" Gibbs snapped. "Tell him that if you aren't both at your desks in an hour he's out of a job."

"Yes, boss," McGee said, grabbing his weapon and car keys, before scurrying off to the lifts.

Ziva watched McGee leave with an expression of undisguised glee on her face. She was so pleased that Tony, the bumbling clown, would finally be facing some consequences for his actions. Gibbs, on the other hand, watched McGee leave worriedly. Despite his gruff demeanour he felt as though acid was gnawing away at his gut. Tony was never the most punctual person but he had never been this late before, at least not without sending word. He also knew better than to be unreachable. Something was definitely wrong in this situation.

Sure enough his gut was proven right when, 45 minutes later, McGee hurried back into the bullpen with a small amount of concern for Tony on his face. "Well?" Gibbs snapped. "What did you find? Was he there?"

McGee shook his head. "Boss, he doesn't even live there anymore. I spoke to the woman who lives in his apartment now. She said she moved in two months ago. One of the neighbours said that Tony moved out almost a month before that!"

"Pull up his personnel file," Gibbs ordered, trying to figure out why Tony wouldn't let on that he'd moved. "See if he's updated his contact details."

"He has," McGee said a moment later, rattling off the address of a house in the same neighbourhood as Ducky.

"Grab your gear," Gibbs ordered, standing up. "We'll all go."

The area where Tony lived was about twenty minutes away but Gibbs made the drive in fifteen. They pulled the car up in front of a house that was about as different from any place they'd thought Tony would live as it was possible to be. The house seemed more like a family home than the bachelor pad they'd all thought that Tony would have. "Well, I'll be dammed," Gibbs said. "Maybe DiNozzo's finally growing up."

He gained access to the house by picking the lock and McGee managed to disable the alarm before it went off. They took a look around the house, again surprised by its style. Tony still had his state of the art entertainment system and massive DVD collection but other than that it seemed like he was trying to create a totally different living environment from his last one.

There was no sign of a struggle and Gibbs was interested to note that Tony seemed to be preparing to do some decorating in one of the bedrooms upstairs. In the master bedroom they found the bed unmade and a pair of sleep pants abandoned on the floor. Tony's cell phone was on the bedside table. It was obvious that the Senior Field Agent that dressed and gone out in a great hurry.

As he and Ziva secured the house again so they could go back to the office, Gibbs handed the cell phone to McGee. "We need to know where he went in such a hurry. Can you find out who called him last?"

McGee scrolled through Tony's call list. "A Katrina Hessing, boss. She called at about 1am this morning."

"Has he mentioned anything about this woman to either of you?"

"No, boss," McGee said.

Ziva snorted disgustedly. Why would she ever pay attention to the names of any of the slags Tony spent the night with before discarding like a used piece of trash? "Probably his latest tart," she said dismissively."

Gibbs frowned, not at all pleased with the comment. He'd noticed that Tony was taking a lot of shit from both McGee and Ziva lately but hadn't done anything about it, hoping that the two younger agents would realise on their own that his second was an excellent agent. If anything, though the abuse Tony was taking had only gotten worse. Gibbs knew that he was going to have to step in but he decided that this wasn't the moment to do it. Finding Tony was more important than issuing reprimands, no matter how well deserved, right now.

By the time they got to the office it was after 10am. That meant Tony had been missing for around nine hours now so Gibbs deemed it prudent to inform Vance. Tony wasn't the director's favourite agent but even he was concerned. Vance told Gibbs to keep him informed.

Neither McGee nor Ziva were happy about having to expend so much effort looking for Tony, both feeling as though he had probably gotten drunk last night and was now sleeping off his hangover in some poor, unsuspecting woman's bed. Nevertheless they both knew better than to flout an already annoyed Gibbs' orders so, after informing Abby that Tony may be missing, they got down to business.

As she seemed to be the last known person to have spoken to Tony, they ran a background check on Katrina Hessing. They learned that she was a 27 year old waitress who lived in the city. Just like Tony she didn't answer either of her phones and when McGee and Ziva went to check out her home she didn't answer the door. Obviously, unlike with Tony's place, they couldn't pick the lock and go in but they assumed that she wasn't home. They stopped by the bar where she worked only to be informed that she had resigned a few months ago, apparently planning to move to Seattle.

They reported this to Gibbs who by now was really worried. DiNozzo had obviously been keeping secrets from him and Gibbs hated it when his second did that. The Senior Field Agent was a trouble magnet and Gibbs needed to know all the facts in order to rescue him.

"What have you gotten into this time, DiNozzo?" he mumbled. "You better be okay or I'll head slap you into the next century!"

**_Back to Tony and the babies in the next chapter. I'd hoped to have them in this one as well but I felt the rest of the team needed to be shown. Gibbs is worried but McGee and Ziva have a long way to go before Tony will accept any support from them. Please review. I am also taking suggestions for baby names. Please give me your ideas when you review. _**


	3. Chapter 3

It wasn't until after midday that if finally occurred to Tony that it would be a good idea to touch base with someone at NCIS. He knew that he should contact Gibbs, who was probably tearing the city apart looking for him by now. He knew that he needed to contact Vance to explain the situation and organise to take a leave of absence. He did neither of those things, though. Instead he borrowed a phone from one of the nurses and called Ducky. As he was an ME most of Ducky's patients were dead adults so his medical knowledge probably wouldn't be much help in this situation but right now Tony desperately needed the calming, comforting presence the elderly ME had provided throughout all his numerous health issues.

At NCIS word had spread throughout the building that Tony was missing. Most people were of the opinion that he had gotten himself kidnapped again so Ducky was mightily relieved to get Tony's call and find that the SFA was safe and sound. He listened, shocked as Tony explained the situation and then promised to be right there. Young James Palmer hadn't quite finished his M.D. so he probably wasn't yet ready to manage the morgue on his own but some things were more important than a job. As he prepared to leave the building, Ducky briefly considered going to fill Jethro in on the situation but decided that right now Anthony's need was greater than Jethro's and a trip upstairs would just waste precious time. After all, Ducky had no idea what condition the littlest DiNozzos were in so he thought it prudent to get to Anthony's side as soon as possible.

Instead, to stop everyone worrying, he sent a message upstairs with a security guard, simply saying that he had heard from Anthony and was going to be with him. Jethro would be annoyed he hadn't provided more detail but in hindsight Ducky knew that it was Anthony's prerogative who did and did not get to know about twins. As he got into his Morgan and drove to the children's hospital Ducky contemplated the situation and realised that over the past few months there had been several signs that Anthony's life was changing in a big way, signs which he had misinterpreted.

Ducky had watched as Anthony matured and started taking things much more seriously. To his grief he had also watched as Anthony grew apart from the rest of the team. He had thought that Anthony was becoming hardened by the brutal taunting he was getting from Ziva and Timothy. The best that Ducky could pinpoint things had started to change while Jethro was away in Mexico. The good natured teasing that the team indulged in turned cruel and bitter, at least on Ziva and Timothy's part and as a result Anthony had grown apart from them. When he returned Jethro had done nothing to reign the pair in which they seemed to have taken as carte blanche to do what they wanted. Jethro's lack of action had seen Anthony pull away from him as well and young Abigail, who hero worshiped Jethro, hadn't even realised there was a problem so followed the rest of the team, inadvertently adding to Anthony's torment.

Ducky had thought about mentioning this to Jethro but he knew his young friend didn't like being told he was wrong and wouldn't respond to his criticism. Instead he had tried to help Anthony when he could but now it seemed that he hadn't done as good a job as he thought. Ducky now realised that Ziva and Timothy's teasing didn't even register in importance to Anthony anymore. He hadn't matured because of the teasing; Anthony had bigger things to worry about. He had been trying to change his life because he was about to become a single father. Anthony hadn't explained on the phone but Ducky had come away with the understanding that the boys' mother wasn't going to be in the picture.

Ducky's thoughts turned to the littlest DiNozzos who, even now, were in the NICU. He didn't know much about neonatal medicine but he did know that, born at 27 weeks gestation, in this day of modern medicine single infants had a 95% chance of survival. The odds were probably a bit different for twins, though and if the babies had inherited their father's luck things could be going extremely well for them or extremely badly. Ultimately Ducky felt that he had better get to young Anthony's side and assess the situation as fast as he possibly could.

Arriving at the hospital the staff weren't keen on the idea of letting someone who wasn't a parent or extended family member of one of the NICU patients inside. Luckily Ducky managed to convince them to make an exception after he showed his Navy ID and medical credentials, explaining that Anthony had no family other than the two little boys they were currently caring for. He donned a gown and entered the unit. He spotted Anthony right away, sitting between two incubators, gently holding the hands of his two tiny sons, through the portals in the incubators which for that exact purpose.

"Anthony," he said quietly, approaching the small family.

Tony looked at Ducky with an expression of undisguised relief on his face. Ducky couldn't make the situation any better but Tony would be lying if he said he wasn't at least a little bit comforted by the elderly ME's presence. "They're so small, Ducky," he said, not bothering to try and hide the fear in his voice.

Ducky looked at the DiNozzo twins. They were very small but he knew that that was because, born at only 27 weeks gestation, the fatty deposits under their skin hadn't had the chance to grow. They would be kept in incubators to help regulate their body temperatures while on a feeding tube to help them gain weight. The boys were on something which Ducky recognised as C-PAP. That meant that their lungs were underdeveloped and they required more assistance taking in oxygen than nasal canulas could provide. Whilst it was somewhat disconcerting to see most of the two tiny faces taken up by the masks Ducky took it as a good sign that they didn't require full ventilation. "How small are they, exactly?"

"2.9 pounds and 2.7 pounds, the nurse said," Tony told him, returning his attention to his small sons.

Ducky laid a hand on Anthony's shoulder. "So small but not so small that they don't have a fighting chance," he said encouragingly.

Tony nodded but Ducky wasn't entirely certain that the young man had heard him. "I must have been mad to think that I could do this on my own, Ducky. How can I be a father? It's not like I've ever had a good example. They'll probably end up even bigger screw ups than me!"

Ducky was pleased to hear that Anthony was allowing himself to believe that the twins would survive, although he did realise that Anthony probably wasn't allowing himself to consider any other possibility. The younger man probably felt as though he had to fight for his sons and be strong for them because there was nobody else who would. He thought that Anthony's doubts about his parenting skills were entirely understandable. Every new parent had doubts and fears that only went away with time. Anthony's fears though were that much more prevalent because he had had parenthood thrust upon him three months earlier than he'd expected it to be. It was also true that Anthony had never had a good example of what a father was supposed to be. He had been, at best, neglected by his biological father and it seemed that he felt abandoned by Jethro, his surrogate father.

Ducky still felt, however, that Anthony would make an excellent parent. At the very least he would know what not to do. Ducky could already tell that Anthony would go the extra mile for his sons to make sure that they had a better childhood than he had had and even though the twins weren't going to have their mother in their life Anthony wouldn't be without support. He planned to offer the three DiNozzos as much support as possible and Ducky had no doubt that when he heard about this Jethro would open his eyes and once again start acting like Anthony's father, which he considered himself to be.

"Don't be silly, Anthony," he reprimanded gently. "You aren't a screw up and these two young men are lucky to have you for a father. I can already see how much you love them. Besides you won't have to face this on your own."

The ghost of a smile tugged at the corners of Tony's mouth. It was nice to know that he wouldn't have to face single parenthood on his own. 'Presuming, of course, the boys survive,' he thought, the dark tendrils of doubt once again beginning to invade his mind.


	4. Chapter 4

There was a nurse talking to him again but thanks to Ducky Tony was able to focus on what she was saying. Ducky had opened his eyes to the fact that the twins' chances were good and that he had to be strong for them and believe in them because there was nobody else who would. Ducky had said that things would be okay and Tony was shocked to realise that he was actually starting to believe that.

"I know how scary it is to have one child in the NICU; I had my daughter at just 26 weeks so I can't imagine how you feel with two in here," the nurse said to him. "But we're going to do everything possible to take care of both them and you."

"Thank you," Tony managed to say.

"Do these two sweet men have names yet?" the nurse asked.

Tony shrugged helplessly. He'd decided within hours of finding out that he was having twin boys that their middle names would be after the two most influential men in his life but he was yet to settle on first names for them. He'd thought that he would have more time.

God, there was just so much that he had to do, Tony thought, starting to feel overwhelmed. Picking their names was probably going to be the simplest task on his to-do list. Ducky was going to see Vance and fill him in on the situation but Tony knew he would have to see the director in person sometime soon to arrange a leave of absence. He needed to build the nursery. He needed to go shopping for baby supplies. He needed to get brave and fill the rest of the team in on his new situation. And that wasn't even taking into consideration the many things he would need to do if the twins had even one or two of the health problems that the doctor, whose name he had promptly forgotten, had warned him could be possibilities.

"I haven't narrowed it down yet," he revealed.

"Well, that's okay," the nurse said, squeezing his shoulder. She seemed to sense Tony's dilemma. "You just take your time."

She walked away leaving Tony alone with his sons. It equally awed and terrified him that these two tiny beings were dependent on him for everything. He alone was responsible for these two tiny lives. When he thought about it like that Tony couldn't help but feel jealous of the three couples hovering over their infants who were also in the NICU. At least they had each other.

Deep down Tony knew that he wasn't really alone. He believed it when Ducky said that he would help and the ME had also said he would fill Gibbs in on the situation. Ducky was sure that Gibbs would want to help but Tony wasn't sure what good the former marine could do, especially while the boys were in the hospital. Gibbs had been invaluable to him on the numerous occasions he had been in hospital but Tony doubted that the same strategy would work on his sons. After all, it wasn't as though Gibbs could just order the two boys to be okay.

That is, if Gibbs managed to get in here at all. Tony understood that Ducky had probably talked his way into the NICU with his medical credentials but the rest of the team probably wouldn't be allowed in because they weren't family, not that he particularly wanted most of them there. Abby's boundless energy and blindness when it came to Gibbs would probably do more harm than good right now and after the way they'd treated him Tony wasn't sure that he even wanted McGee and Ziva to know he had kids let alone to be near them.

Catching a slight movement from the corner of his eye Tony noticed that one of his sons was awake. He carefully put his hand through one of the portals in the incubator and stroked the boy's tiny hand. It bummed him out that he couldn't hold his children but Tony understood that the boys needed the support that being in the incubators gave them. The doctors had said that, if things went well, in a week or two they could try something called 'kangaroo care' in which he would be able to hold the boys for short periods of time. Tony could wait until then and in the mean time he would take what he could get. The nurses had told him it was important for the babies to get to know his voice and his touch.

"Hey buddy," he whispered. "I'm your dad. I have to admit I don't know much about being a dad but I swear I'll always do my best for you and your brother. I'll be strong for you but I need you to be strong for me, too. I need you to be okay!"

* * *

"Jesus!"

Gibbs needed a long swallow of bourbon in order to comprehend what Ducky had just told him.

After getting Ducky's message via the security guard earlier in the day Gibbs had hurried down to the morgue to get some more information, only to be told that the ME was gone for the day. With the search for Tony called off and knowing the rest of his team was unlikely to get any work done without the SFA around Gibbs had dismissed them, knowing that Ducky would seek him out eventually.

It hadn't been until quite late at night, though and by that stage Gibbs had already been at home, working on his boat in the basement. Ducky had stayed with Anthony for quite a while before returning to NCIS to speak to the director. He had suggested that six months would be a good amount of time for Anthony to have off. The young man would need that much time to get his sons through their many health issues and bond with them as well as to get used to single parenthood. If the worst did happen, though Anthony would also need that time to mourn.

Luckily, as well as being Director of NCIS, Vance was a family man and had readily agreed to the request, though Ducky was fairly certain Vance would have agreed even without his own family. The ME had noticed how, recently, Anthony's relationship with the director had greatly improved. It was ironic, in a sad sort of way. Even as Anthony had grown apart from the team, his surrogate family, he had earned the respect of the director he had long mistrusted and, in turn, grown to respect him as well. These days the pair were almost cordial with each other.

Then, Ducky had had to go and tell Jethro about the birth of the littlest DiNozzos, which was by far the hardest part of his night. The normally stoic marine's face had been a tumultuous range of emotions as he'd heard the news. Ducky knew that not only would this bring back memories of his lost wife and daughter for Jethro but it would probably open his eyes to how far his once close relationship with Anthony had fallen, that he hadn't already been informed of the twins' impending arrival well in advance.

Even worse was the fact that Ducky was going to have to tell him it would be a long while before he could make this truly right. The DiNozzo twins were going to be in the NICU for a long time, a place where, other than medical personnel, only parents and some extended family members were allowed. The hospital were already making an exception for Ducky and they almost definitely wouldn't make one for Gibbs who, although he considered himself Tony's father, had no medical or legal standing to enter the NICU and visit the twins. Tony wasn't going to want to be away from his sons for long periods of time so, at least until the boys were stable, it was going to be a while until Jethro and Anthony could sit down and talk.

For his part Gibbs couldn't believe it. Tony was a father! His son was a father!

A disturbing thought occurred to him. "Why wouldn't he tell me about this? Why wouldn't he trust me?"

Ducky frowned. "Really, Jethro. For the leader of a team with the highest case closure rate in the whole of NCIS you are surprisingly unobservant."

Gibbs glared at the ME. "I'm not in the mood for riddles, Duck."

Ducky usually liked people to figure things out for themselves but in this case he decided to give Jethro a break. "Really, it's been going on since you left for Mexico but its gotten worse in recent months. Ziva, Timothy and, to a lesser degree, Abigail have been tormenting Anthony awfully and you haven't lifted a finger to help him. I imagine you're probably about to say that Anthony is a grown man and can fight his own battles, which is true, but as team leader, isn't it your responsibility to ensure harmony in your ranks? I've watched as Anthony tried and tried to earn their respect but failed every time. The others either can't or won't look beyond that childlike mask that he wears. It seems to me that Ziva and Timothy, especially, have taken your non-action as a sign their behaviour is acceptable. If Anthony can't rely on you professionally why would he rely on you personally?"

Gibbs ran a weary hand over his face. "I never meant for things to get this bad, Duck. I have noticed what's been going on but I wanted to give Tony a chance to sort things out himself before I stepped in."

Ducky nodded. He'd expected an explanation like that. Jethro would certainly not act as malicious as his behaviour these past few months had seemed, at least not to Anthony. "I know but Anthony is going to need us all in the coming days, weeks and months, Jethro. You helped to cause this problem and now it's going to be up to you to make things right."


	5. Chapter 5

As early as he thought he could get away with it the next morning Gibbs left the house and drove to the hospital. He wanted to see Tony as soon as possible and start trying to make what was a horrible situation right.

He had just spent a sleepless night going over and over the past couple of years in his mind. What he could recall made his gut burn with shame. Incidents that had seemed okay – amusing, even – at the time now made him feel physically ill. Ducky was right. As team leader it was his responsibility to ensure the smooth running of the team and he had let them all down.

Yes, Ziva, McGee and Abby were extremely culpable for their treatment of Tony but he was just as much to blame. In public he almost never treated Tony like the son Gibbs considered him to be so, learning by example, the others thought it was acceptable to never treat Tony with respect.

Gibbs knew that Tony DiNozzo was a brilliant agent, by far the best that had ever worked for him. Tony should have known that as well but Gibbs knew that after years of listening to the rest of them demean his abilities the younger man might not. No matter how outrageous, when an idea was reinforced in your mind over and over again by the people that you were supposed to be able to trust the most you eventually started to believe it.

Gibbs felt horrible. Looking back now he could see that Tony had been pulling away from the team ever since he'd returned from Mexico. He knew that that needed to change. If only he hadn't treated Tony so poorly the younger man might not be alone right now, facing a terrible situation.

Gibbs wasn't good at the touchy, feely, emotional stuff and never had been. He knew, though that he needed to go to the hospital and make it very clear to Tony that they were family and that he wasn't going to have to face the very uncertain future alone.

He wouldn't let the others (aside from, of course, Ducky) near the three DiNozzos yet, though. Just because he had seen the light regarding his treatment of Tony didn't mean that the others would. In fact Gibbs had a horrible feeling that they may just make things worse at the moment. McGee and Ziva would make horrible comments about the illegitimate status of the twins, ignoring their fragile health, and while Abby would undoubtedly want to comfort Tony in this difficult time Gibbs didn't think her enthusiasm would be appropriate around the NICU.

That was the other reason Gibbs wanted to get to the hospital as soon as possible. He was really keen to establish the condition of the two littlest DiNozzos. Hearing about their fragile state of health had brought back terrible memories of Shannon and Kelly's deaths; by far the worst time of his life. While loosing Shannon had been awful, Kelly's death had been a million times worse and Gibbs knew that if the twins died Tony's loss would be even worse than his own because Tony wouldn't have anyone to blame for the tragedy.

If he lost his sons Gibbs knew that Tony would sink into a deep, dark hole that he would probably never get out of. A part of Gibbs felt like if the twins were going to die he needed to know as soon as possible. There wasn't anything he could do to change the fate of the DiNozzo twins but Gibbs felt like he could, and should, do everything in his power to save their father if the worst did happen.

On the other hand, though Gibbs felt it would be wrong to expect the twins to be anything other than one hundred percent okay. The babies couldn't fight for themselves so they needed as many people as possible to fight for them. Gibbs was no doctor but the least he could do was believe in them.

Countless times now Tony had ended up in hospital at death's door but every time he had made a full recovery. The twins were DiNozzos. Surely they would have inherited their father's legendary luck and stubbornness.

A slight smirk crossed the ex-marine's face. It seemed strange to think of Tony as a father but the more he thought about it the more Gibbs realised that his SFA had the potential to be a much better parent than most. Tony had suffered neglect at his alcoholic mother's hands and both emotional and physical abuse at his father's hands. Tony had never known what it was like to have a happy family and Gibbs knew that Tony would go out of his way to make sure that his sons never suffered the same way he had done as a child.

Gibbs smiled as he realised he truly believed that the DiNozzo twins were going to be okay. The small family had a long road ahead of them but Gibbs felt it in his gut that everything would turn out for the best and he planned to be there for the DiNozzos every step of the way.

At the hospital he easily found his way upstairs to the NICU but he was told on no uncertain terms by the charge nurse that he wasn't going into the unit itself. He had no legal or medical reason to go in there and the more people who went in there the higher the risk of infection the babies were exposed to. Put like that Gibbs couldn't really find it within himself to argue. He really wanted to see Tony's sons but he would never dream of endangering them so he would wait until they were stronger. He did persuade the charge nurse to page Tony to the waiting room for him, though.

Tony arrived a few minutes later looking irritated. He had promised Ducky and the nurses he would go home for a few hours each day to eat, sleep and shower but other than that he didn't want to be away from his sons for too long at this early stage, lest something change while he was gone.

He rolled his eyes when he saw that it was Gibbs waiting for him. He wasn't surprised to see his boss. He had been expecting a visit like this ever since Ducky had offered to fill Gibbs in on the situation but he wasn't sure that he felt like dealing with his boss yet.

"What?" he asked tiredly, hoping that Gibbs wasn't going to start a screaming argument.

"You moved," Gibbs blurted before he could stop himself.

Tony snorted. As if that was important right now. "It took you three months to notice," he shot back.

Gibbs had to physically bite back the sarcastic response that immediately sprang to mind. He truly didn't want to start a fight with Tony and the younger man had a lot of credit in their relationship right now. "How are your sons?"

"Stable," Tony said succinctly.

"That's good," Gibbs said. "That's really good."

"Yeah it is," Tony said. "Gibbs, what are you doing here? Ducky said that Vance's given me six months off so until February I don't have to think about the team or anything even remotely related to NCIS. Please Gibbs. I don't want to fight."

"I'm not here to fight," Gibbs said reassuringly. "Tony, I'm sorry."

Tony raised an eyebrow suspiciously. Gibbs almost never apologised and on the rare occasion he did it was never without a catch. "Wow," he said sardonically. "No head slap for not showing up at work yesterday and an apology. Did I forget that it was by birthday or maybe Christmas? I thought that apologies were supposed to be a sign of weakness."

"Not among family they're not," Gibbs said. "I screwed up with you, Tony. I saw what the others were doing to you but I thought you would want to be the one to deal with it. I didn't realise that you were waiting for me to step in."

Tony swallowed hard. He'd be lying if he said he hadn't felt betrayed by the man but inaction was the ex-marine's only sin. Gibbs had never added to the abuse he'd been taking from the others. Gibbs was still family and as easy as it would have been to push the man away and stay angry with him Tony needed all the family that he could get right now. "S'okay boss. You never did anything."

"No," Gibbs said, self depreciatingly. "I didn't. And that's the problem."

"Still," Tony said. "You were never anywhere near as bad as the others."

Gibbs still felt as though he had a lot to make up for but he recognised that now wasn't the time to push. Tony was barely holding it together right now and he didn't need to have his boss' guilt dumped on his shoulders as well. "I need to go to work now but can I come back later?"

Tony nodded. "I guess that would be okay. Just don't tell any of the others yet, okay? I can't deal with anyone but you and Ducky right now."

"Okay," Gibbs promised. "Whatever you want. Hang in there, Tony. Everything's going to be okay."

_**It will be a while before Gibbs and Tony are totally okay but I wanted Tony to have an ally other than Ducky. Things won't be anywhere near as easy for McGee, Abby and Ziva, though. Next chapter: Tony will finally name his sons. **_


	6. Chapter 6

The next day brought what would be the first in a long line of milestones for the small DiNozzo family. Tony's two sons finally got their names. When he first got back to the hospital after going home for a few hours of sleep Tony was still no closer to figuring out what to call the boys than he had been when they were first born. Then, though some documents from Kat's attorney were delivered to the NICU by special messenger.

Tony read through the documents with a growing sense of shock and disbelief. He'd known for months that this was coming but he was shocked that it was happening so soon. The twins were barely three days old and Kat was already starting the process to effectively disown them.

Tony was quite angry at her, really. For his whole life family had been in extremely short supply for Tony and what little he did have were, for the most part, totally unsavoury. Now, though after almost 35 years he had a proper family and he couldn't imagine any circumstances that would cause him to walk away from the boys. Admittedly she'd hardly seen the babies but Tony couldn't fathom how Kat was just turning her back on them.

Reading through the documents reality set in for Tony. He'd known for months that this was going to happen but that morning it all became real. He was completely on his own in the world. There was nobody to protect and nurture these two little lives but him. He felt a few tendrils of his fear from the day the twins were first born begin to creep back in but he ruthlessly quelled it. Tony knew that the babies didn't have anybody but him. He had to be there for them and he couldn't afford to let any of his irrational insecurities get in the way.

Kat's attorney seemed to have been extremely thorough so all that was left for Tony to do was sign the papers and get them to his own attorney who would officially file them in court. Then he would officially be a single dad. The problem was that Tony's attorney would need to include a copy of the birth certificates when he filed the paperwork in court. For the birth certificates to be processed the babies needed names.

It seemed like a huge task to Tony. Whatever decision he made his sons would be saddled with the names for the rest of their lives. What if he made the wrong decision and caused them to be mocked mercilessly when they started school? Kids, after all, were cruel these days. Tony frowned. He was thrilled that his kids were boys; after all, what father didn't want a son? In some ways though he knew this may have been easier of the twins were girls.

"Oh god, what do I do, kiddos?" he mumbled, touching his children's tiny hands through the portals of their incubators, taking great care not to dislodge any of the numerous leads and wires they were both still attached to.

Once again Tony felt jealous of the three couples who were hovering over the other three infants in the NICU. Judging by the amount of machinery around each incubator his twins may actually be doing better than all those babies but at least the couples had each other. They could tackle each of the challenges of parenthood together. Tony, though had to face all those responsibilities on his own.

Finally, however he reached a decision and borrowed a pen from one of the nurses to fill all the paperwork. The smaller, slightly less developed twin would be called Thomas Jethro DiNozzo and his bigger brother would be called Theodore Donald DiNozzo.

Grandfather Paddington, basically the only relative Tony had ever liked, had been called Theodore 'Ted' Thomas Paddington and Tony had long since decided that his sons' middle names would be after Gibbs and Ducky. As pissed off as he still was with Gibbs Tony wasn't going to change his mind. Before the team had started falling apart Gibbs had been a very important figure in Tony's life and while the new father wasn't ready to deal with Abby, McGee or Ziva he did feel that Gibbs had made up a lot of ground by coming to the hospital yesterday and apologizing.

Coming to reclaim her pen the nurse squeezed Tony's shoulder and smiled when she saw that the little DiNozzo boys had finally been named. As a single father who had stepped up to the plate Tony, and by extension his sons, were great favourites with the NICU staff and the small family were really being looked after. "Great choices, honey," she praised Tony. "I'll get their name bands printed out."

"Thank you," Tony said gratefully, giving the paperwork to another nurse who would get it messengered over to his attorney's office.

Tony stroked Tommy and Theo's tiny cheeks or, at least, the small amount of skin he could touch around the C-PAP machines. He didn't know what he had considered them before but now that they had names it set in for Tony that his sons were real, live actual living, breathing human beings.

It occurred to him that he wasn't alone in the world anymore and, for once, he really felt as though everything was going to be okay.

* * *

Over at NCIS, though things were anything but okay. Tim and Ziva would never admit it out loud but they actually sort of missed Tony.

Arriving at work that morning the first thing they had been hit with was an announcement from the director that Tony would be out for at least the next six months doing another job. The fact that Tony's 'job' was caring for his family rather than something professional was something that both Vance and Gibbs had neglected to mention. Vance felt as though it wasn't his place to reveal his agents' personal business and Gibbs was sticking to his decision not to let McGee, Ziva or Abby near Tony or his sons unless they admitted that they'd done something wrong.

Abby had been hysterical when she heard Tony was going to be gone for so long, thinking that something was wrong, and the other two had been gleefully curious, thinking that Tony was being disciplined. Gibbs had evaded their questions, though and gotten them all to back off, leaving them all with the impression that the reason for Tony's absence was classified, all without having to lie to them.

Gibbs was fairly certain that they would all respect the chain of command but just in case they tried to track him down the next time he saw Tony he would suggest that the senior agent change his cell phone number.

The glee on the faces of the two junior agents when they heard Tony was gone for six months wasn't lost on Gibbs. He smirked inwardly feeling that, after all the shit they had given the senior agent, this was the perfect time for them to realise just how much more work Tony did than them. DiNozzo may goof off a lot but he was actually the hardest working one of them all. His personal mantra of 'work smarter not harder' wasn't just a joke.

Vance had promised that within a couple of days they would have a temporary agent but for now it was just the three of them. Gibbs divided Tony's normal team work between the three of them and dropped the senior field agent paperwork on McGee's desk.

Very soon, though Gibbs began to wonder if his plan was backfiring on him. With the number of questions McGee had already asked it was blatantly obvious that on the numerous occasions he had acted as senior field agent for Tony McGee had only done part of the paperwork with Tony picking up the slack himself. Tony would have had a bigger workload but it would have been easier than taking the time to explain everything to McGee. The younger agent was already getting overwhelmed and Gibbs couldn't imagine what McGee was going to be like when they had a case to investigate.

As the day wore on Gibbs became increasingly frustrated with both Ziva and McGee. Without Tony there to reduce the tension everyone else was having to cope with the brunt of his temper. He'd head slapped McGee a record 11 times. He'd forced Ziva to go diving through a dumpster they currently had in the evidence locker. He was withholding CAF-POWs from Abby and he had sent a mail clerk off in tears.

Gibbs would never begrudge Tony the time he had off to spend with his sons. The three week break he'd had after Kelly was born to this day remained the sweetest time of his life. Gibbs sure wished Tony would hurry up and come back, though.

It was going to be a really long six months without him.

_**There's another chapter done. Please tell me what you think. I would also be interested to know whether you would like this to remain solely a family story, focusing on the relationships between Tony and his sons and the three DiNozzos with the team or whether you would like a bit of romance as well, perhaps giving Tommy and Theo a mum and Tony someone he can depend on. **_


End file.
